Are you having a hard time moving on?

By Alice Nduta

How should one deal with breakups?

Relationships are never easy, they comprise of inevitable ups and downs; the rockier the merrier or so they say. This is because of the difference between you and your partner that can be challenging. These challenges can overcome the love between two in a given relationship and thus leading to a breakup.

Whether a person is breaking off from a healthy relationship or a toxic relationship, one needs to deal with the breakup. It is advised that people should try to deal with the breakup issue in a positive way since a break up does not mean the end of one’s life.

Relationships can be interesting, helpful and healthy. Real love may also include fear and the deeper the love the more the fear, it is human nature.

One can embrace the following ideas when dealing with a relationship breakup.

  • Take a break from social media

In one way or another, social media affects our relationships whether positively or negatively. It is also termed as a ‘big thing’ when one posts’ another person especially of a different gender on any of their social media accounts.

During the breakup period, one is fragile, hence one is in a high position of misquoting their partner’s posts. Although it might also be true that your partner may be getting back at you through their post which can affect you thus slowing down your recovery process. It’s due to this reason and many more that one should take a break from social media.

  • Request support from friends and relatives 

Friends and relatives will always remind you of your self-worth, your self-importance and also your purpose, thus helping you not to breakdown completely.

They can also help you rediscover and reinvent yourself for a greater good.

  • Cry it out

It is ok not to be ok. It is always healthy to show out that you are not ok. So as to get help, cry it out until you accept the fact that; what you once had is no longer there. Denial of reality is one of the causes of depression and may also lead to dysfunction or abnormal dysfunction.

  • Have a healthy issue resolution process

This will only come up first if you accept your situation as it is. Avoid blaming the cause of the break up on anyone including yours. Avoid harmful ways of letting out your anger like;

  1. Moving on quickly
  2. Faking it
  3. Abuse of drugs or/ and alcohol


  • Learn from the loss

There is always a lesson to learn in every situation in life so take whatever happened as a lesson and take it easy on yourself.

  • Acknowledge positive aspects of the relationship

Even if it didn’t work out, there is always that memory/ memories that you can look back and be glad they ever happened.

  • Have patience

Be patience with yourself, things always get better at some point in time.

Suicide is never a solution