Globally, couples and dating people witness some instances that make them begin doubting their lovers. If enough care is not taken to correct the thought or when seeking clarification, the relationship between the two maybe a gone case.
Love and relationship are the most fragile substances that bring the two opposite sex (not grayish nor lesbianism) together hence those who are involved need to learn some of the reasons why their partner may go cheating in order to try and salvage their relationship before it is too hot.
For men, the following are the reason why some of them find themselves cheating their wives and or their girlfriends.
- Ufisisism. Yes, this may sound crazy but some men are born strong urge and desire for ladies, the fisi type. They like to have lots of women after them. To them, it’s just a game. They think it makes them real men to have sex with lots of women.
- Some men they see the new lady more appealing than what he has. Such men often confuse lust with love, choosing partners this way is a sure way the relationship will fail
- Peer pressure. One may fail to understand how peer pressure is related to cheating. When an “innocent” man assumes company of the “fisi” type people, they will lure him to getting somebody to keep them company in “that club” as they sip a cup of muratina or wine and eventually a cheat spirit will find its way to the pair.
- He had poor role models – When it happens that his company was full of cheaters and much if his role models in his life were cheaters then he may be following what he knows. Infidelity is the norm for some.
- He’s too immature. The psychology of human life here comes into justification. Immaturity. Some men have really immature friends who get them to act just like them. They hang out together like they are still in college and do things to look cool to each other even if it means cheating.
- He needs to be entertained. When things go from warm to hot, from laughter to anger and from curdling to fighting within the house or relationship, the man will be tempted to seek refuge in the heart of another woman who will comfort his feelings. If they aren’t finding the same excitement in their relationship as they did when you two first met, they will look for it somewhere else. This is not your fault. It’s his.
- He’s been emotionally damaged. Men experience emotional trauma as women do, but some handle it much differently. Some suppress their hurt feelings and take it out on their partners
- He wants power and control. Another reason men cheat is to be in control. Dr. Saltz says men have the power in the relationship when they choose to be unfaithful.
- He’s very weak. Some relationship experts also believe some men are just too weak to say no. When the opportunity presents itself for a dalliance men just do not know how to say no and walk away.
- He cannot resist. This is another surprising reason why men get tempted to cheat. Some who have ever fallen victim to cheating cite “irresistible woman” as the reason. He’s hot and women are attracted to him. Some men do not know how to say “no” to sexy, strong women
- He doesn’t care. Cheating is addictive and a serial cheater cannot stop if he does not know what drives him towards such behaviour. However, if he doesn’t see a problem or simply does not care to change there is nothing that can be done to help him
- He doesn’t feel appreciated. As the woman of the house, and the first lady to his heart it is the duty of the woman to appreciate the man when he achieves something. Feeling unappreciated in a relationship can leave a man feeling empty. Constant criticism and blame may have him looking for positive feedback elsewhere. In a new relationship, everything is compliments and sweet words.
- He wants to feel like he’s desirable. Men and women want to feel desired. Men are expected to provide security, strength without getting the acknowledgement for it. This can lead to resentment as he begins to feel he is simply the provider, the caregiver. In a new affair he feels like he matters in the relationship.
- He is tired of the relationship. Sometimes men cheat because they simply do not want to be in their current relationship. In such kind of cheats, the man may bed his “mpango wa Kando” on the matrimonial bed. Rather than being honest about what he wants, he will have an “exit affair” in the hopes you leave him afterwards.
- “Obviously she will forgive me”. According to relationship advisors, this happens if once or severally he has cheated before and you forgave him. Men quickly realize that if they got away with it once, twice, they’ll be able to get away with it again and again.
- He was under the influence of alcohol or drugs. Yes, this is the common reason. Alcohol and drugs give a sense of being invincible. They make the user’s body demand for great things inclusive of pleasure. Whatever happens during the intoxication time is actually unprinted in the memory of the man therefore he may end up even not knowing what happened in that club or lodging. Inhibitions and good judgement are thrown out the window when people are under the influence. It doesn’t excuse the behaviour of cheating and one night stands, but it does happen.
- Sex addicts. Sex addiction is a medical condition that does exist. Compulsive cheating and sexual activities has serious consequences for the addict and the people in his life. Nonetheless, it’s not as common and not the same as just regular cheating.