By Lucy Wanjiru
It is very easy to fall in love than to stay in love, here are some reasons why it is hard to stay in love:
Poor communication
Communication issues are the major causes of break ups especially when there is no proper communication between couples, this lead to misunderstandings. This happens when people do not communicate properly or they are not open with one another. Also people tend to keep information that can break their relationship rather than speaking it out and getting clarification from their partner. This leads to lots of misunderstandings.
Cheating
Cheating is a cause of break ups as it causes a lot of pain and bitterness especially to the person being cheated on. Cheating leads to scars that are very hard to heal. It might also lower a person’s self-esteem. The one cheated on might blame themselves for their partner’s cheating. It can lead to the person losing trust with people of the opposite sex.
Lying
Constant lying can be a cause of a break up especially for those people who lie about almost everything; they cannot even speak some basic truth. In this case the partner being lied to feels that he has been taken for a fool. Lying results in lack of trust in a relationship leading to its termination.
People don’t live up to their first impressions
Love is said to be blind because one might love somebody without necessarily knowing much about that person. It is natural for someone to judge a person after their first meeting however, people tend to behave differently in the presence of a new person in order to impress them. People can pretend for a period but after a while their true personality starts to show. Many people break up upon realizing there are some things that their partner hid from them in the beginning, one starts noticing how different the other person is and they cannot tolerate their new behaviours.
Financial issues
During casual dating, money issues may not arise but become serious when people are living together. Common causes of disagreements are when one partner is spendthrift and spends money on non-essentials or when a partner is extremely mean. He/she does not want their money to be used, and they tend to even hide financial information from their partners.
Money disputes may lead to power issues and cause mistrust and/or insecurity.
Sex
Sex is a very big issue in a relationship especially when couple do not sexually satisfy each other or when they lose interest in each other. This may lead to cheating or even a break up.
Abusive partners
There are partners who are naturally abusive; they simply let out their frustrations on their partners. Abuse may be physical in terms of beating or psychological where one partner insults the other or brings them down using abusive words. It may be also in form of actions where a partner does something that is disrespectful.
The person being abused tends to feel pain and humiliation and might decide to leave the relationship.
Simply not on the same page
In the beginning, someone does whatever their partner wants but with time one starts doing whatever one likes. At this stage one will realize that their partner is a different person; one may realize that a partner may be adventurous and outgoing in the beginning but in real sense that person prefers to sit on the couch and maybe watch TV. That person used to go out just to make their partner happy but as time goes by one realizes that their preferences are different.
This brings a lot of differences between the couple especially if the couple is not able to iron out those differences and could lead to a break up due to many disagreements.