Breakups are terrible. They make you shiver when the sun is hot like the person who dumped you. They make all sweet food taste like pepper, and the laughter of people sound like ridicule to your bruised heart. How can they be happy while you are unhappy? However, there are ways to avoid a terrible breakup. These few steps will ensure that you come out with your ego intact.
Don’t overcommit yourself.
Some girls imagine they are responsible for a man’s well-being. They fully commit themselves to wife roles. Many cook, wash heavy duvets (the size of the red carpet the president walks on) and literally move in. You may say it is love. Without hesitation, I will tell you it’s over commitment. Avoid doing all the above nonsense. Grow your nails, paint them the color of the rainbow and stretch yourself on the sofa. He who loves you knows where to find you and how to woe you.
Never fall in love helplessly.
To avoid contemplating suicide after the person who said you are the air they breathe says you don’t matter, don’t fall in love. Falling in love is a feeling but we choose what to do. Be selectively in love and avoid being emotional. That’s the recipe for being suicidal when things go south.
Avoid tight friendships with a man’s family before marriage.
Who cursed girls that if they become friends with a man’s relatives and friends, then the marital gates will be widely opened for them? They are his relatives and friends, not yours. They will be nice to you just as they are nice to his other girlfriends (incase he’s a player). All you can do is just be nice and courteous to that bunch of hypocrites. If it doesn’t work out, hit the road without feeling betrayed. They owe you nothing, owe them nothing in return.
Don’t listen to what he says, interpret what he means.
The folly of listening to what a man says and not interpreting word by word is that his actions will surprise you. For instance, don’t just be content that he said he loves you and promised an all-white wedding. Look for fillers in his statement. Does he say he hopes you will marry when he is financially stable? Danger words are “hope” and “financially stable”. Hope means he’s also not sure. So who should be sure? Run away from all guys who want to taste the cookie but say they are not financially stable to marry. It’s a fat lie. What if they never become financially stable? They are not ready for marriage.
Always keep your options wide open.
It’s a pity how women are naturally loyal and decide to be exclusive in a relationship when the man is not for it. It’s not that women should hop, step and jump from one man to the next. Just respect yourself and give what you are given. Don’t give more than you are given. It also involves not chasing potential suitors away because you assume a man who doesn’t make any promise or commitment thinks about you and has made them.
Stop fighting women you don’t know in the name of “fighting for your love”.
Every time a story that a girl has called another girl who has a relationship with her boyfriend reaches me, I have always laughed and rolled on the floor. Like seriously girl? Come on, you can do better than that. Simply put, that’s self-inflicted stress. The fact that you need to fight to protect the said love is enough proof that it’s not worth it. Get a life and avoid such low life and classless theatrics.
Don’t promote yourself to titles like fiancée, wife or even call yourself an imaginary name.
Being with a man for months or years doesn’t make you his wife. Being married legally or traditionally does. Don’t imagine yourself a man’s fiancée if he has not asked. Or imagine he would want to have kids with you so you name them in advance. By being patient, loving and getting to know the man such developments will happen. Spare the poor man leading questions like “what are we?’ “Where is this going? “And all other useless questions women ask when in a hurry to get married.
Walk away before you are dumped.
Don’t wait for those heart breaking words “it’s over” or “I am committed elsewhere”. When you sense that the end of a relationship is drawing near and near, be the one to walk away; believe me you, it will caress your broken ego.
Never ignore danger signs.
Violent people, cold lovers or those who can’t commit can be spotted from far. Never ignore one violent slap, a threat to kill you or words like “I fear women or men”. These are signs that you will get nowhere. Run before it’s too late.
Stop calling and texting a man who doesn’t return your calls.
It’s surprising how in spite of the fact that we have all work hustles, new soap operas and new series being released, a woman would still have time to call a man who doesn’t return her calls. Give a man ample time to look for you if he’s interested. Never call endlessly. You can say you gave him your heart, how about your kidney? He doesn’t have your kidney. Relax and avoid a terrible heartbreak.