‘Come we stay’ relationships, also called cohabitation, refer to unmarried heterosexual couples living together in an intimate relationship. They are arrangements not sanctioned by either civil, religious or traditional authority but where a man and woman decide to live together as husband and wife.
In Kenya, there are no available statistics on ‘come we stays’ since they are not recognized by the state, but it is evident that they are on the rise especially among young people in urban areas. Anonymity in the urban areas offers a perfect setting for cohabitation since parents and relatives live in the rural areas and may not learn about it until much later, in most cases when a child is born. In fact, it is feared that ‘come we stays’ are quickly displacing legal marital unions.
A man needs a job before getting a woman
I know all the men are loading their guns right now- go ahead and shoot! Adam was given a garden before he was given a woman. So don’t be tempted to house your boy (as I said earlier huyo si mwanaume) in the name of love simply because he is broke! Let him go and hawk sweets in a citihoppa but don’t feed or even dare to think of housing him!
You will age prematurely
Any boy who doesn’t want commitment will get you admitted to a mental hospital faster than you can pronounce IEBC! He will cheat on you, eat your cash, demand lungula every day and crown that package with two babies and a serious STI!
Your mind will retrogress
In short you will become dumb! Mjinga! I know you are wondering why; instead of engaging your mind on how you will get to the corner office or buy that kaplot in Syokimau, your mediocre mind will just be thinking of getting his mama the latest vitenges from Ghana in a bid to make him propose. What demon is that?
You are precious.
Woman don’t you know that Adam was a first draft and Eve was a masterpiece? God designed the woman after he made man because we are just so special! Quit offering yourself for free because you are so damn expensive!
Cheap labor services
Your worth will be on the same level with a mop, a washing machine and a sufuria. You will wash his underwear (which has toured all counties), clean the house, cook him a five star meal with your hard earned cash and give him babies but this ego centered fool will never wife you! Save your manicured nails!
You deserve a good man
Good men still exist and all you need is a little bit of patience as you eat life in a big spoon .You deserve a man who will worship the ground you walk on, a man who will honor you and love you like you are the only precious person left because guess what- you are!
Blood pressure is fatal
It kills, yes I said it. Stop doubting me! So girl, please quit all the desperate moves, don’t listen to fools who tell you that the come we stay will be legal after six months. If he can’t put his ugly signature on a marriage certificate, run for your life!
What God puts together, let no man lay asunder
Sermon can’t end without mentioning the author of marriages. God does not bring to you confused breed of boys. He brings you gentlemen. Gentlemen like Joshua who said ‘as for me and my house, we shall serve the lord!’ Gentlemen who will guide you and honor you, gentlemen who will give you cute babies with small noses and great minds like yours truly.